#FerrellTakesTheField

Will Ferrell makes people—and cancer—look good. On March 12, Ferrell did what any decent human would: he sacrificed his day to play five games for ten teams in ten positions at the MLB Spring Training in Arizona. Ferrell dedicated his time—and body—to create awareness for two cancer causes: Stand Up to Cancer, an organization that…
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Whatchya Gonna Do With All That Class?

What happens on social media, stays in the media. #lessonslearned Vogue’s editor teaches us all a lesson: what not to do. Elisabeth von Thurn und Taxis, Vogue’s Style Editor, posted during Paris Fashion week, “Paris is full of surprise…and @voguemagazine readers even in unexpected corners!” Its to no surprise, Maryse Dumas, the homeless woman captured…
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It’s Always About The Damn Cookies

For years I’ve been bitter towards Girl Scouts. It’s not that I don’t love the causes they support or the valuable lessons their organization teaches… It’s always about the damn cookies. According to People magazine, a troop from Salem, New Hampshire is about to make Girl Scout Cookie history. The skills taught and utilized to sell…
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How Long Is Your Schlong?

After what seems like eternity, researchers can finally tell us whose penis is too big, whose is too small, and which little guy is juuuuuust right. Are you wondering if your cock is shorter than the flock? You want to know, but you’re afraid to measure. What if you don’t size up? Here’s my dick,…
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Sorry Won’t Unburn My Steak

Remember when I made you a guide of “13 Things to Remember Next Time You Dine Out”? This weekend I utilized that. I met my boyfriend, brother, and his friend for dinner. It took us a half hour to decide where to go at 7:30PM on a Saturday night, when half of the town was…
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My Phone Smells Like Swedish Meatballs

Imagine a world where the lack of cell battery isn’t a worry. #firstworldproblems Let’s go back in time. Remember that Disney original movie called Smart House (1999), featuring Kevin Kilner, Ryan Merriman, and Katey Sagal—now a Son’s of Anarchy star? You know, the movie about the teen who wins a futuristic robot house with a…
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Six Minutes With Obama

Five, four, three, two, one. The doors open to the White House and you are summoned in by officials. They lead you briskly to a conference room. At this point, you have tunnel vision, unaware of the people around you due to the adrenaline pumping through your veins. “The President will be with you shortly,”…
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Eating For Pleasure, Force-Feeding Your Sex Drive

Out of the closet—and just in time for the hype of 50 Shades of Grey—comes a relatively new-found sexual fetish to compete: feederism. Urban dictionary defines feederism as, “An underground sexual fetish which involves one partner (the feeder) feeding the other, both to obtain sexual arousal and to encourage weight gain in the feedee.” Many…
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13 Things To Remember Next Time You Dine Out

My parents have always been big advocates of work ethic. When I was 14, they decided it was time to expand my “skill sets” and pushed me into the bustling restaurant world (which doesn’t make sense, because I already knew how to wash dishes). It all started one Saturday afternoon; they threw me in the…
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7 Things I Wish I’d Learned In School

Rather than starting off your day with some terribly depressing news about a fatal car crash, the latest on our state’s financial status, or new born puppies being burned alive, I thought I’d enlighten you folk out there. I want you (and congress, teachers, schools, etc.) to know what I’ve been missing in life up…
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